When Your Day Goes Badly

December 3, 2013 § Leave a comment

Today was a soul crushing, life sucking, mind bending (in a bad way), excruciating day.

Maybe I’m taking it too hard. I am thin skinned after all. In every sense because my skin turns bright red if I am embarrassed or flustered or if it is touched only a few times. Or maybe I am right and even some hard ass black belt Navy Seal type would consider this a really shitty day. I just don’t know what it was objectively, but I do know that emotionally it was devastating. 

My manager at work told me she is going to talk to HR about what I did last week, which was the opposite of what she said not to do. I take that to mean that she would like me removed from my position, fired if you will. The pseudo-manager, known as the “coordinator,” seems to have taken over my one and only project, which I gathered when he started telling me to do things by email, like “draft this report please” or “get me this data please”, which are all the things I had been doing on my own for my now former project. And then, later today, he asked me to give some of my previous work to a colleague who then used it for a note from him to my manager. My manager it seems had completely forgotten the work I had done and would be seeing this as new work for the second time.

After work, things weren’t much better. I went to three bank machines before finding one that worked. I waited for 25 minutes in line at the post office. When I finally made it to the counter, the woman behind it said that I would have to reaffix the prepaid stamp and preprinted label on my package. I had sliced them in two so they could fit on two sides of my small box. She said, “See that’s why there’s this line going across the length of the bottom. You aren’t supposed to cut there.” So I said, “How was I supposed to know what that line means?” “Because the line is made up of arrows. See.” And she pointed to the arrows that made up the line. As I left, mumbling to myself, a teenager standing by the exit in the rain extended his hand without saying a word.

When I got home, I dried myself off, ate eight Oreo cookies, drank a large glass of milk and watched t.v.  My sofa that I love was comfortable. Somehow I felt I should have cried a bit. But I wasn’t sure why anymore.


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